Lavigne, Lohan, Perry & Simpson Aim to Revive the Riot Grrrl Movement on Their Terms

Listen up music fans! Avril Lavigne, Lindsay Lohan, Katy Perry and Ashley Simpson are teaming up to form an all-girl punk band called Grrrrls Rule. These 4 pop superstars intend to pick up where Sleater-Kinney, Bikini Kill, and the like left off. Bands in the original riot grrrl movement addressed serious women’s issues such as rape, domestic abuse, sexuality and female empowerment. Lavigne, Lohan, Perry and Simpson all agree the songs and style of the movement were a bit abrasive for their tastes and the subject matter was too “heavy”. Simpson described the Grrrrls Rule style as “riot grrrl light.” “We don’t want to alienate our guys.” Perry added, “yeah, we’re not really the bra burning types”. Lavigne was quick to point out that she’s “married to a guy”. Lohan will be fronting the band and assured interviewers that she is no “angry lesbian” and the music and lyrics they’re writing will be palatable to everyone. “I mean, after all, Katy’s I Kissed a Girl was a huge hit. That’s the kind of thing we’re going for, but with a little more of an edge.” According to their label, Grrrrls Rule’s album will be out Valentine’s Day 2010. Watch out for their spring tour later that year.